I won’t bemoan my limited access to books. I could, easily – but I won’t. Instead, I’ll say this:
Thank goodness for podcasts. While baking bread, driving Mia to school, making salt dough, I learn how trauma lodges itself in the body, why all of reality is interaction, how vulnerability and courage can be linked by hope. My favorite podcast right now is On Being with Krista Tippett. While hearing Michael McCarthy talk today about defending the natural world not from behind a wall of statistics, but rather from a place of joy, I thought, This. This is what the world needs right now. If we all followed the silky thread back to our own selves, the one linking us to our experience of nature – however that may look like – then it would be personal. And if it’s personal, it can be defended.
I’ve been trying to figure out what makes me feel good at the end of the day, and here’s what I’ve come up with so far. A good day, for me in this season of my life, is one in which I’ve: taught the kids something new; made a bit of money; done something with my hands (breadmaking counts, as does making paper puppets); had some time to talk one-on-one with Rony; and had some sort of intellectual stimulation. If I can squeeze in some way to nurture my own creative soul, such as playing piano or writing in this blog, then I go to bed feeling satisfied. Of course, on those days the house is usually a mess.
Today was a good one. I translated a short document into Spanish for a friend, took out the finger paint and let the kids go wild, taught Mia how to recognize the letter “p” by painting it all over my own page, helped both kids identify the trees in which the vultures were hanging out (I don’t know why they were there), made some carrot-squash-ginger-coconut soup, and got inspired by a podcast. Rony took the kids to the lake so that I could finish dinner and have a breather… so I’m breathing here for a few minutes before attacking the battleground that is my kitchen. Bread’s in the oven, soup is simmering on the stove. Even though the things I got done were simple things, as I sit here typing these words I feel a tremendous sense of accomplishment.
There will always be bad days, and knowing this makes me extra grateful for the good ones.